It’s 11:28pm, and he has to be up at 5:30am. He put the girls to bed tonight, again, so I could jump on emails. He spent the whole day loving on us, carrying a beach cart up beach access stairs, making sandcastles, bathing the girls, making snacks, telling me my butt looks nice (about 5 times, so way less than the usual;)) — and the guy is really downstairs doing dishes right now.
When we were first married, I loved him IMMENSELY. Like flirt all day, jump into his arms, can’t get enough time and attention from this man. And we had a baby, and I felt the same but couldn’t always find the energy or time to show it…and he was actually REALLY lazy back then (he will admit it) — he had been a lazy bum for a while and it was starting to wear on us. I couldn’t keep up with nursing, new baby, new business and then completely take care of an ENTIRE household on my own. I went off on him a few good times, and really laid into him..and then it changed. I begged him to start picking up the slack and then he realized, the more he did to help me, the more it helped me be a better mother and wife..because I shouldn’t have been doing it all alone.
Now, years later…he is always on trash duty, laundry, dishes but we both pitch in generally. He sees things that need to be done and DOES them instead of walking by them and over them all the time. He just pays attention more and it has changed our marriage. You can be SO in love with someone and then realize as time passes, things will come up that you need to communicate about and grow through together. I hear guys say they’ll “never change a diaper” or “do the dishes” etc…and I just think to myself, well…you suck and you’re really in for it, and your woman deserves better! Marriage is all about team work, and I LOVE that term because we are truly in every sense of the word a team making it happen every day.
We know it sounds scary to add a third baby, so close in age, too. We will have a 4 year old, a 1 year old about to turn 2 and a newborn in the house at one time…and gosh you guys, it really does sound crazy but our friendship dynamic and determined best friend team work state of mind lets us know we can handle anything together as long as we make that decision to keep choosing each other and LOVE first, before all arguments and before all blame games. I love you for doing the dishes tonight, and I promise after this blog is scheduled so that it goes live at midnight, I’m coming to bed to tell you how much I love and appreciate you and then shove the body pillow between us and straddle it because I’m pregnant and exhausted 😉 HAHAH 🙂