You’re going to get a shot at what you want your life to be like at some point. Have you ever heard the opening dialogue for the movie The Choice based on the Nicholas Sparks novel? Yeah…he’s right. He’s always right, my boy Nick 🙂 Haha! But really, the truth is that it’s just a series of choices that continuously lead to one another and really shape your destiny.
For me, it was a simple as the day I’ve mentioned in other blog posts. The most un-extraordinary that shaped the entire rest of my life as I knew it.
I woke up on my back, looked up out the window at the brightest, bluest sky I had ever seen. When was the last time I noticed a sky that blue? When was the last time I appreciated the sunshine? It was 2007.
I have got to break up with my boyfriend. He’s awful. We break up like every other week and it’s embarrassing. He chooses video games over me and won’t let me go to Hooters with him… what am I doing?! Is this what love is? Is this what I want? Can I value my heart and soul enough today in this moment to at least say this bold statement here and now: I actually do deserve to be happy and have a good life.
Now, I’m SUPER imperfect. I’ve done and said things along the way in my life to very much not deserve a lovely life but God’s grace is this completely unbelievable thing that says yes, you, sinner…you get another chance. Something, some force told me on the day in 2007 with the bright blue sky that I could be happy and that I should be happy. I shut up for once, and I listened.
You don’t care about the breakup today, but you’ll lose it in a week. You’ll pretend you’ve changed and make empty promises again. And then, that’s when I’ll need the strength to be a woman (a really small, mostly scared and lost in life woman) on her own. To stand ALONE confidently for the first time in my life. I can do this.
I did it. And when I finally started to love myself and this single thing, I “re-met” Mike aka we messaged on Facebook and decided to go have a drink together.
I let go of self-hate, of insecurity, of the unfit boyfriend, of the lack of self value and then Mike showed up. Coincidence?
I want you to know, whoever you are… that your life is valuable. Your happiness is important and it should be a high priority. You can date the mean guy, but only for a moment so you can appreciate a Mike rolling through later in life. Don’t waste your time, time is limited and making the most of of it is something you will never regret at the end of your days.
Be happy. It’s the least you can do for yourself.
This weekend I sat under our house, our unfinished house that needs some work for better appeal but you know what, things are functioning and we are alive and healthy. We did water balloons, bubbles, chalk and the girls ran through the hose misting all over their sweet little lively faces.
I was brought to such tears knowing we were doing simple things and feeling such happiness together. When it comes down to it, as they say on the show Nashville, we really have…
A life that’s good.
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