One of the biggest hurdles I ever leapt over was when I decided to trust a group of women with a different part of my heart. Not just the “we’re in the same industry, yay!” part of my life…but a part I didn’t even know much about yet. The part where I started a walk with God and felt worried that I wasn’t going to understand what I was doing or the path I was on.
I would be the “new guy” who knew the least.
I would be the least seasoned or educated one when it came to the bible.
The most awkward pray-er, lol.
From the beginning…my worry was winning and I was already focusing on all the wrong things. NONE of those worries mattered. This isn’t about image. It isn’t about looking good or winning some Christian contest of who is the most godly, lol. It was just the same old insecurity creeping in and I was already missing the point.
When I came to learn more about the Lord (and more about myself), I realized that negative self talk and creating non-existent situations and scenarios were the work of the enemy creeping in. Of course I was almost talking myself out of this walk with God before it even started…I was scared. It was new. A book I recently read and soaked up like a sponge that REALLY dives into this concept and resonates with me so deeply was Crash The Chatterbox…I couldn’t stop highlighting and couldn’t put it down. We really talk poorly to ourselves and because of that constant self-chatter and fear of judgement by others…we stray from the entire point of this walk.
This walk was never about me, it was about God. It’s about trusting Him and His plan. It’s about trusting these women who have been there for me and who have been praying for me before I was praying about anything. When my friend Katelyn said “we’ve been praying for you for so long” it kind of hit me that this community was more than just an industry friend and connection here or there. This group was so richly submerged in the word of God because they had learned to trust and lean into His plan, even during the hardest times, and there was no worry about ulterior motives there. What a free feeling, being accepted to come exactly as you are, broken, faulted and completely imperfect. These women changed my life.
Community is so hard for some people. With life experiences that had occurred in the past it was so hard for me to trust. Trust is a leap of faith and Brene Brown shared in her books that “trust is choosing to make something important to you vulnerable to the actions of someone else” and for some reason, doing that with these girls always felt right…so I kept rolling with it. When they showed up in my living room after our accident and kept my daughters happy while I could barely walk, their hearts shining so brightly for Jesus.
They lead by example, express their faith unapologetically and kindly, pray for one another and endlessly support.
For the first time in my life, I saw that this kind of community did exist and I felt so warmly welcomed and thankful to be there. I would have missed out on so much had I not learned to trust that God had this community waiting to strengthen my heart and soul.
If you’re like me and trust is something that takes a little more work, I encourage you to find a community you can lean on and pray with. It will absolutely change your life! I know it’s scary to start, but we aren’t mean to go through this alone.
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