Let’s all get one thing straight from the beginning of this self admission and statement of a blog — it doesn’t mean I don’t like to talk on the phone. It doesn’t mean I don’t want to call you and just make things so much simpler using conversation. Is it easier to use quick and efficient English language a million miles a minute to spout out ideas, discussions and conclusions versus sitting here and typing typing typing away all day? Of course! But there are MANY reasons this is not something that’s going to work for my business and family while they are so young!
1. Like a blogger mentioned in this post — general chaos ensues. I’m not even kidding you, it feels like 90% of the time I pick up a phone call..within 3 minutes SOMETHING has gone wrong and one or both children are crying. In fact, the other day my sister called to tell me something of TMI as usual and sure enough– Cammy comes rushing down the hallway where I have her sister on the floor with me, blanket over her face and knocks RIGHT into her, knocking her sister down on the ground. Screaming, instantly. My dad saw it, my sister heard it. Things like this are just inevitable and it basically makes me forget about everything we just said, lose track, and have to start this SAME conversation allllll over again later..so that just happened to my children because I was on the phone and it was avoidable. AHH!
2. The two year old. She loathes when I’m on the phone. When she’s hearing my voice speaking to someone besides her and her sister, she instantly feels left out and ignored! She will start singing as loudly as she can, crying, demanding attention however she can and I have to be honest, I know it’s important to pay attention to the person on the other line but it makes me feel very guilty to ignore her, and then I’m probably not concentrating on the person on the other line anymore 🙁 Sorry, it’s true!
3. I’m still nursing and it can get a little crazy holding a baby, adjusting things and a phone too.
4. …and my two year old needs help on the toilet still because she can’t reach. So let’s picture nursing, being on the phone and helping a two year old on a toilet. It’s a little scary isn’t it?! Haha!
5. Mom brain doesn’t allow me to retain the info I once could without a record of it..so in EMAILS I can look back and see specifics and things we talked about and recall things visually instead of trying to remember from the same brain that changes 12 diapers, nurses 8 times (YES she eats THAT MUCH..look at her legs!), makes 3-4 toddler meals daily, potty trips, runs a business, etc. And mom brain is not an excuse, believe me that it is VERY real. I’ve walked back in the house from running errands several times to see that I never closed the refrigerator door..seriously? Never had that problem in my life before now hahah!
6. Phone numbers are one of the last private things we can hold close to us in a world where we have technology allowing personal contact through messaging, email, comments, etc. I don’t have an office where I have the opportunity to have an “office phone” and I personally have had a vendor give an inquiring bride my number before and received texts as late as midnight asking me questions…when I had a toddler and was pregnant with the next baby, exhausted and sometimes very sick. So, I’m sorry that I don’t give out my last personal method of contact but it really is for current brides, friends and family only and they know that if I don’t answer I’ll do my best to get to it when I can!
7. This allll could change. Down the road in 5-10 years I could become more able to talk on the phone all day long when kids are in school, etc but I certainly will remember not to judge or guilt those who are unable to. Unfortunately the people who seem to have the biggest issue with it are mothers who have grown children and have clearly forgotten what it’s like or were not running a business from THEIR homes at the time their children were growing up and it breaks my heart because that’s who I need the most understanding from! Don’t break my heart and be a butthead to a fellow mom!
Remember, we all run our businesses differently and we go into business for ourselves because we need to make them work around our lives and families. It’s not uncommon for me to not meet with a couple before booking or to correspond only via email because lots of my brides are in grad school, working full time or run their own businesses and they SO get it. I swear I have the classiest bunch around and they’re kind to boot!!! I am VERY grateful for all of them and how they have allowed me to be a better mother to these wild women understanding that email, although make take a day, two days..sometimes more in busy season..works best for us 🙂