They all come to us. Everyone in the house and even those beyond..everyone asks mama. Where things are, what’s for breakfast/lunch/dinner and three to four snack periods in between. What clothes they should wear, where the clothes even are to begin with. The schedule is determined around what she knows and how she has the ability to assess a week, a day, a lunch hour. Appointments, get togethers or events can’t even be scheduled without our minds working to THINK for everyone else around us first to puzzle piece our lives next steps together accordingly.
Man, I LOVE having this waitress-turned-wedding-photographer fast paced mentality and am grateful for it so much now that I have children..I can think FAST and determine my moves and decisions with such purpose and intention. There are days I wish a video crew was taping me holding the baby while cooking and opening and closing things with my feet and elbows doing things you would never think possible..I am proud of those moments. The moments I can think and act fast.
But…everyone reaches a point where the thinking starts to become a burden…you feel cloudy and overwhelmed. You want to be quick on the decision making and answers but you can’t because it’s been too much, too consecutively, for too long. Someone asks you a question, and you snap at them. They ask you another later and you cry or just lose it because there are TOO many things at once happening and you haven’t stopped to take ONE MINUTE to just breathe and stop decision making for everyone else including yourself. Stopping one task to answer someone’e question is just too MUCH.
There is ONE THING I realized this year as a mother of two that I needed more and more that thank goodness I finally decided to take advantage of. The time out for MYSELF…the good kind! I actively made the decision to STOP decision making, thinking for everyone and telling my husband I was on the verge of a mama meltdown so that he would watch the girls and give me some minutes to myself. But…really alone. I love time out with my friends and people in the wedding industry but having alone time in huge for me and very detrimental to me function better as a mother and business owner! Time with others is important to me too and helpful, but I need alone time. Time to read a book or magazine, uninterrupted. Time to brainstorm with a clear mind, time to just eat an entire meal to myself and not get up 10 times, just some time.
I was NOT fond of this idea for two and a half years. I don’t like to choose to ever be away from the girls because I’m up their butts and everyone knows it. When I had my first encounter with Mike saying “why don’t you just get outta the house for an hour” — and I took it, it changed EVERYthing for me! I realized I would come back to the house a better and happier mama and refreshed after cooling off or just clearing my decision making mind for a little while.
I know it sounds obvious and silly– but scheduling one of these a week to start (for you stage five clinger mamas like me) is a GREAT idea! My first version of this was MOM HOUR on Sunday evenings to watch my favorite show (don’t judge!!!!) – Kardashians at 9pm alllll alone in our bedroom. Could I still hear the kids? Yes– but I just turned up the volume and texted Mike to pipe it down out there so I could enjoy my time haha! It’s helpful and if you’re feeling a little mama burnout, there is nothing wrong with going for this! Try to up it to 2 mom hours a week!
Lots of the action that happens in this house on Instagram documenting our story! 🙂 Follow Cammyellieseastars!